Friday, December 28, 2012


First of all Thank You Thank You Thank You for the 12 year old Irish Whiskey

                                                          Sweet Sweet Victory

I can't tell you how much I appreciate that and I can assure that most of it is already gone.  Now let's have a look at the whole year. 

THE TEAM won 21 games and lost 9 during the regular season and of course ended with win number 22 and the G League Championship.

Melody played in 22 games.  She batted .397 with 18 RBI 2 Doubles 2 Triples 31 walks and an OBP of .596

Dora played in 25 games.  She batted .416 with 22 RBI 5 Doubles and 1 Walk.

Jad played in 26 games.  She batted .451 with 28 RBI 6 Doubles 1 Triple 15 Walks and an OBP of .528

Natasha is only 14 games into her stellar career with THE TEAM.  She batted .588 with 11 RBI  6 Doubles 2 Triples 5 Walks and an OBP of .625

Doug played in 27 games.  He batted .622 with 37 RBI 1 Home Run 12 Doubles 3 Triples 13 walks and an OBP of .671

Randy has only been on for two full seasons.  He has played in 18 games.  He batted .714 with 34 RBI 6 Doubles 2 Triples 7 walks and an OBP of .743

Rick played in 28 games batted .728 with 56 RBI 1 Home Run 17 Doubles 5 Triples 9 Walks and an OBP of .752

Peter played in 28 games.  He batted .729 with 82 RBI 16 Home Runs 19 Doubles 4 Triples and 4 Walks.  Holy S**t

Lou played in 28 games,  He batted .849 with 86 RBI 24 Home Runs 27 Doubles 6 Triples and 13 Walks.  Super Holy S**t

Those are some serious stats

GO THE TEAM!!!    

Monday, November 19, 2012


It's true. THE TEAM has finally won it all.  After 14 seasons, 78 wins and 62 losses with so many great players coming and going.  After losing to WP4B in the Winter 2012 Season and losing to Fugittaboudit in the Summer 2011 season.  THE TEAM beat Balls N' Dolls 21-19 and are Finally Champions.


THE TEAM played like champions.  We won the toss but chose to be visitors so we could bat first.  Lou hit a leadoff triple.  Melody walked.  Peter hit a 3-run Home Run and THE TEAM never looked back.  Everybody was hitting.  There were zero strikeouts and 4 walks.  Even the outs were good hits.  THE TEAM didn't give away any at-bats.

There was a lot to be proud of.  We played within ourselves and never came unglued when things didn't go our way.

                                    THE TEAM knew if we played our game we could not lose.

                                             We battled the sun and won that one too!

                                                   Natasha and Lou both pitched beautifully

                                                              Tastes like victory


                                    Let's look at this picture again. It's a nice one. Thanks Bonnie

        Thank you also to Jenny for starting THE TEAM.  To Tyler for starting this blog.  To Sandy for keeping THE TEAM going.  To CJ for keeping THE TEAM alive when Sandy left.  To Chris and Dave and Victor and Terrence and Destanie who set a high standard and helped turn THE TEAM into winners.  And to the man upstaris Garry Marshall for those sweet awnings on the diamond we were supposed to play on.

GO THE TEAM!!!                              

Monday, November 5, 2012

THE TEAM - Fall 2012

It's time for THE TEAM to win a championship.  That is all that is left for the Fall 2012 Season.  THE TEAM swept a doubleheader to finish 7-3.  Sweet sweet victory.  Doubleheaders are a blur and they suck so a lot of those details get overlooked when it comes time to write a blog.  Some details cannot be overlooked like Doug hitting a Grand Slam and Lou hitting 3 Home Runs in a Game and Kelly going 4 for 4 with 3 RBIs and Melody hitting a Triple.  Here is something awesome:  In the first game against Tiger Blood, THE TEAM batted .700.  In the second game against 5150 THE TEAM batted .763.  THE TEAM killed it.  That's two games, 48 runs and a .731 average with 5 Home Runs, 4 Triples, 14 Doubles, 6 Walks and only 1 Strikeout. 

Let's all hold hands and reflect on how we got here.  For the Fall 2012 Season THE TEAM batted .577 with...  my God I'm tired. 

Here's what you did:

3 Lou pitched and played shortstop and led THE TEAM in pretty much everything.  He batted .846 with 10 Home Runs, 4 Triples, 10 Doubles and 30 RBIs.  He didn't lead THE TEAM in walks but made up for it in loud noises.
8 Jad played first and second and did some catching.  She batted .488 with 2 Doubles.  She led the ladies with 15 RBIs and for the fourth straight season remains the player most likely to fight someone from the other team.

10 Melody played second and the outfield.  She batted .346 with a Double and Triple and 3 RBIs.  She led THE TEAM with 13 walks giving her an OBP of .564.  She also led the team in F-words.

12 Natasha pitched.  Yes she played a few other positions but really she led THE TEAM in pitching.  She batted .481 with 2 Doubles, 2 Walks, and 4 RBIs.  She had an OBP of .517 and led THE TEAM in keeping it positive

15 Cheryl only played in one game.  She batted .000 but she led THE TEAM in tattoos.  Not even close

18 Rick batted .676 with 1 Home Run, 4 Doubles, 2 Triples, 3 Walks and 15 RBIs and led THE TEAM in paperwork

19 Doug played centerfield.  He blew up in that last doubleheader to finish the season batting .548 with 1 Home Run, 3 Doubles, 1 Triple, 3 Walks and 13 RBIs.  He led THE TEAM in Grand Slams.

21 Randy played third and first.  He batted .692 with 5 Doubles, 2 Triples, 1 Walk and 13 RBIs.  He led THE TEAM in thinking baserunners were leaving early.

24 Peter played shortstop third and left.  He batted .744 with 2 Home Runs, 9 Doubles, 3 Triples, 1 Walk and 28 RBIs.  That is a spectacular season.  Peter led THE TEAM in not being crazy. 

25 Dora played catcher and some Rover.  She batted .486 with 11 RBIs.  She led THE TEAM in shots down the third base line.  She also led THE TEAM in crafty base running.

27 Brandy played in 1 game.  She batted .000.  She led THE TEAM in being nervous and not showing up.

30 Kelly played rightfield mostly.  She batted .464 with 1 Double, 2 Walks and 10 RBIs.  She was clutch with runners in scoring position.  She led THE TEAM in remaining silent.

38 Jeff played in only one game and batted .000 before a bicycle crash ended his season.  He led THE TEAM in injured thumbs and facial hair.

THE TEAM finished strong.  Now it's time to take that momentum to the Championship game.


Monday, October 29, 2012

Effed League

Let's not just type "tough loss"  one thousand times.

Did you know?

Lou hit for the cycle and threw another clutch home run on the pile and we still lost

Did you know?

THE TEAM scored a season high 19 runs and we still lost

Did you know?

THE TEAM batted .641 with 3 Home Runs 2 Triples 4 Doubles 5 Walks and only 1 Strikeout and we still lost.

Did you know?

Everybody who played had at least one RBI in the game and we still lost.

Did you know?

Ah F**k it!  Tough Loss!


Monday, October 15, 2012

The League of F

THE TEAM showed they belong in F League by winning a nicely competitive game against The Swingers.  This is a team that went 3-2 in the first round so it isn't like THE TEAM picked off some spastic bunch of weirdos.  The Swingers have tasted victory.

There were two innings that THE TEAM went down in order but there were some monster rallys in two other innings.

Overall THE TEAM batted .556 with 3 Doubles, 1 Triple, 1 Home Run and 1 Strikeout.  THE TEAM was there to play.  There were no walks.  Ten players played and 7 of them had RBIs.  Nice!

Kelly had two RBIs on a hit and a sacrifice but she gets edged out by Natasha who got her two RBIs on two hits.  ( So close )  We will award a Melky Cabrera bobblehead to Natasha for an enhanced performance.

Peter went 3 for 4 with a Double, a Triple, his first Home Run of the Season and 6 RBIs.  He gets a Manny Ramirez bobblehead for his enhanced performance.

THE TEAM is looking tough


Sunday, October 7, 2012

Round 1

THE TEAM swept a double header and won the first round.  How sweet is that?  Both of the wins were a little snug but who cares.  THE TEAM will move up to F League because we clearly are ready.

Let's look at the the first round leaders

Batting Avg. Men

.765 - Lou
.722 - Rick
.684 - Randy

Battin Avg. Ladies

.500 - Dora
.421 - Jad
.412 - Natasha

RBIs Men

14 - Lou
11 - Peter
9  - Rick

RBIs Ladies

6 - Jad
5 - Dora
1 - Kelly
1 - Natasha


4 - Lou
3 - Peter
3 - Rick
2 - Randy
1 - Jad
1 - Natasha
1 - Doug


2 - Lou
2 - Peter
2 - Rick

Home Runs

3 - Lou
1 - Rick

THE TEAM batted .517 with 17 walks and 7 Strikouts.  THE TEAM has scored 61 runs and allowed 43.  Lou and Natasha have done a great job splitting the pitching duties.

There are no jokes in this blog



Sunday, September 30, 2012

Game 3 - Das Flappers

They are so precise and disciplined.  They are... 

Hey, The Flappers are a fun group that is out for kicks but they usually don't care so much about winning.  It seemed like they cared a little more for Game 3 but it may have been the heat just keeping everybody quiet.

Who cares

THE TEAM hung 13 on them by hitting .528 with 2 Home Runs, 2 Doubles, 2 Triples, 2 Walks and 1 Strikeout. 

Lou hit a Home Run.  Kelly got her first RBI of the season and Randy collected his first extra base hit to go with another RBI.  Dora had 2 RBIs.

Jad gets awarded a face full of shaving cream or one of Cheryl's earrings or pint of Kelly's blood or whatever.  Jad went 4 for 4 with a double and 2 RBIs.  That brings her average up to .667 which ties her for 3rd on THE TEAM.  We aren't talking about just the ladies, we are talking about everyone on THE TEAM.

THE TEAM is back on the winning track after last weeks flaming bag of Halloween horses**t. 


Sunday, September 23, 2012

Game 2 - Disgusting

That was disgusting.  Balls 'n' Dolls hit a lot of good line drives.  THE TEAM made errors.  That is bound to happen. 

Here is the disgusting part:

THE TEAM batted .375 and scored 5 runs

1 Home Run 1 Double 4 walks and 1 Strikeout


Balls + Dolls were not particularly strong in the field

This is true


Did you know that going to the batting cage is actually fun?

That's true too


Sunday, September 16, 2012

Game 1 - Handing Somebody Their A**!

That was one sweet victory.  Before we get into all of that we should start by acknowledging the pre-season.  Even though THE TEAM went 0-2 there was the scent of promise in the dust of those unraked infields.  There was a double play by Melody and great catch by Kelly.  There was grand slam by Lou.  Right?  That was a grand slam wasn't it? 


Let's look at the Roster:

 3 Lou
 8 Jad
10 Melody
12 Natasha
15 Cheryl
18 Rick
19 Doug
21 Randy
24 Peter
25 Dora
27 Brandy
30 Kelly
38 Jeff

That looks unstoppable.

Holding any team to 2 runs is something to be proud of.  THE TEAM held The Flappers to 2 runs last season but The Flappers don't give a s**t.  The Cereal Hitters clearly gave a s**t.  They may have even given two.  (Only they know the truth)  They were built from the scrap heap of The Warriors and The Jensen Warriors.  It didn't really matter who they brought because THE TEAM was awesome.  The Cereal Hitters scored 1 in the top of the first and THE TEAM scored 6.  After that it was pretty much non-stop slaughter.  Delicious!

THE TEAM batted .625 with 1 Home Run, 1 Triple, 4 Doubles, 3 Walks and 2 Strikeouts.  The defense included an unassisted doubleplay by Randy.  The offense included a Home Run by Lou. 

Lou went 3 for 3 with 5 RBIs so he wins one of Cheryl's long lost earrings.

Jad went 3 for 3 with 3 RBIs so she get's another one of Cheryl's long lost earrings. 

Don't worry.  There are plenty of earrings for everybody 


Sunday, July 22, 2012

THE TEAM - Summer 2012

So that was the Summer 2012 Season.  THE TEAM matched its best record ever by going to 8-2 so even if the championship proved elusive, that is a season we can all be proud of. 

                                         ( Dave saying goodbye to THE TEAM)

Before we get into all of those details, there is a lot to say about what we did to The Burbank Chills.  We use to think they were a loud and enthusiatic bunch with a few assholes along for the ride.  They beat THE TEAM 25-14 in the first round so it looks like we hate them now.  Beating them 17-10 was sweet but wait, it gets better.  THE TEAM batted a season high .697 with zero strikeouts.  Not only that, everybody had at least 1 RBI.  What a way to end the season. 

                                         ( Lou not wearing his jersey)

3 Lou (Yes he has a number) is clearly MVP material...  if THE TEAM awarded that kind of thing.  He played in all 8 games where lead THE TEAM by batting .900.  He led THE TEAM with 8 Home Runs.  He led THE TEAM with 28 RBIs which is also outstanding because being the lead-off hitter he always had at least one at-bat with nobody on base. There were 8 doubles and 4 walks on top of a great job pitching and at SS.

8 Jad played in all 8 games.  She batted .483 and led the ladies with 11 RBIs.  She also had 3 Doubles, a Triple and 4 walks.  She never struck out and was solid at first base.  Jad really went bananas in the second half of the season.  Eight of her 11 RBIs were in the second half where she batted .643 with an OBP of .722.  Dangerous!

                                         ( Melody not using the f-word)

10 Melody played all 8 games on a bad knee.  He batting average is usually higher than the .308 she batted this season but she lead the ladies with 12 walks giving her an OBP of .526 to go with her 7 RBIs.  She was also a versatile player who was strong in both the infield and the outfield.

11 Dave played in 3 games.  That's not a lot of Dave but he sure does make it look easy in Centerfield.  He batted .667 with 6 RBIs, 2 Doubles and a walk.  He also bled like the first 20 minutes of Saving Private Ryan. 

15 Natasha played in 6 games.  She was a spectacualr addition to THE TEAM.  She led the ladies with a .708 batting average.  She led the ladies with 4 Doubles which ties her for second on THE TEAM.  She led THE TEAM with 3 Triples and had 7 RBIs.  She was also a marvelous pitcher.

16 Beth played in only 2 games.  Beth is athletic and plays hard so THE TEAM was cheated out of her talents.  She batted .250 with 2 RBIs.

17 Amy played in 3 games.  She batted .444 with 2 RBIs, a double and 3 Walks for an OBP of .583.  She led the ladies in height.

18 Rick played in 8 games batted .708 with 21 RBIs 4 Doubles 1 Triple 4 walks

19 Doug played in 7 games.  He batted .588 with 11 RBIs 2 Doubles and 1 Triple.  He was patient at the plate leading the men in walks with 8 giving him an OBP of .720.  He also led the THE TEAM in height.

21 Randy played in 8 games.  He busted out this season with a .750 batting average and 16 RBIs.  He also had a Double and 6 Walks.  He was a valuable infielder and singlehandedly won game 1 for us by spotting that bozo from The Burbank Chills.

                                         ( Peter hitting the ball really hard )

24 Peter played in all 8 games and thank God he did.  Peter can do it all.  He batted .774 with 22 RBIs, 6 Home Runs, 5 Doubles, 1 Triple no Walks and no strikeouts.  He knows the game, he is an all-star infielder and he is a sane voice in the whiz-bang group that makes up THE TEAM.

25 Dora played in 6 games.  She hurt her finger on the same day Dave sprinkled his blood all over Burbank so that kind of slipped under the radar.  She hustled and scrambled to a .318 batting average with 6 RBIs and 1 Double.  She is also a smart base runner after those cruel hits up the third base line.

Enjoy the rest of your Summer.


Monday, July 16, 2012

Weak 9

There is nothing to write about this week because The Fockers could not wrangle up enough women to play a game.  I told Mario to call Lou next time.

The week before nobody wrote on the blog.  That's because Chris and Jenny are no longer on THE TEAM and I struck out.  I have struck out 5 times in 115 games and I don't handle it well.  Yes, I know it makes me sound like some broken-hearted imbecile but all of the details of the game zoom right by I am left with a blizzard of f-words.

Here comes one now


The Bombers are a fun team to play.  They are pretty good so it feels competitive but they can't seem to beat us.  Victory number six is always sweet because that sews up another winning season for THE TEAM.  We usually have some heroin after that one.

Now I will make some things up to add more words to this post

I did not strikeout in Game 8



Sunday, July 1, 2012

The Flappers

The Flappers do not take their softball seriously.  There is nothing wrong with that especially since they seem to be having a lot of fun.  The only thing more fun than that is sweet sweet victoy.  You have to give THE TEAM credit because beating any team 20-2 is something.  It's slow pitch.  There are going to be hits, there are going to be runs scored.

Here is what sucks:  I only have 18 runs on the stat sheet.  Somebdoy is getting hosed out of their RBIs.  I am going to imagine that it is Natasha that is not getting her due.  She has been a great player since joining THE TEAM and she is the only one who did not have an RBI in the game.  That just doesn't add up now does it.

THE TEAM batted a season high .667 with 3 Home Runs, 5 Doubles, A sweet freakin' Triple by Jad, 2 Walks and 2 strikouts.

Lou went 5 for 5 with 6 RBIs, 2 Home Runs and 2 Doubles so he gets a towel full of shaving foam crammed into his face. 

Jad went  3 for 5 with 2 RBIs and a shot down the left field line for that triple.  She also was powerful good at first base.  That must be the way they teach it where she's from.  ( She's from Oklahoma right?)  Let's dump a tub of Gatorade across her shoulders.


Sunday, June 24, 2012

Giving it Away to Thee Rookies

Thee Rookies where a savvy bunch.  They knew what they were going to have to do to win.  But the truth is that THE TEAM gave that game away.  There were errors all over the place.  THE TEAM batted a season low .480 with only 2 doubles.


That one hurt and not just because Dave bled all over the place.  It was probably my least favorite game since that fucked up pitcher from The Jensen Warriors wanted to fight everybody a few seasons ago.  ( I think nobody remembers that.  There are a lot of new people on THE TEAM)



Sunday, June 17, 2012

Game 5 - The Fockers

The games against The Fockers are always fun.  They are competitive and we usually win.  THE TEAM had some playes bail out late so we had to play short handed for the first time ever.  That meant Melody and Natasha were taking turns running from the outfield to the infield.   Lou did a great job pitching the whole game and everybody was hitting so the first round ends with THE TEAM 4-1 and hopeless in the tie-breaker.  At least The Burbank Chills did not benefit from their forfeit.  Blood and Spit will win the first round. 

Who cares about those assholes

Let's look at some first round leaders for THE TEAM

Batting Average Men:

Lou .875
Dave .750
Peter .722

Batting Average Ladies:

Natasha .786
Amy .444
Dora .357

RBIs Men:

Lou 16
Peter 14
Rick 12

RBIs Ladies:

Natasha 6
Jad 3
Melody 3
Dora 3


Lou (3)
Jad (3)
Natasha (3)
Peter (3)
Rick (2)
Dave (1)
Amy (1)
Doug (1)
Dora (1)


Natasha (2)
Rick (1)
Doug (1)
Peter (1)

Home Runs:

Lou (5)
Peter (5)

It's true.  We sure don't suck


Sunday, June 10, 2012

The Doubleheader

THE TEAM split a doubleheader.  It stings a little extra because if THE TEAM swept we would have won the first round no matter what happened in week 5.  Instead we are 3 and 1 and need some help.  Of course we are assuming that The Fockers did not beat the Burbank Chills in their second game.( The line from Caesar's Palace in Las Vegas was Burbank Chills - 11.5 with an over/under of 33) 

In the first game THE TEAM batted .533 with 4 Home Runs, 4 Doubles, 1 Triple, 8 Walks and 2 Strikouts.  That was a 19-15 win over The Bombers.  Lou and Peter hit 2 Home Runs each.  The towel filled with shaving foam goes into the face of Lou because he had 5 RBIs.  Dora went 1 for 2 with a double and 2 RBIs so she gets a tub of Gatorade dumped across her back. 

Game 2 had THE TEAM down early.  It was 11-5 after the first inning.  THE TEAM didn't score in the next two innings but neither did The Burbank Chills.  After that it all unraveled but there was a nice rally in the last inning that served to almost disguise the ass-kicking the THE TEAM absorbed.  Not really though.  THE TEAM batted .536 with 2 Home Runs, 4 Doubles, 2 Triples, 5 walks and a very attractive zero strikeouts.  Still it was 25-14 Burbank Chills.    

The line from Caesar's Palace in Las Vegas for THE TEAM winning a championship:   THE TEAM +110


Sunday, June 3, 2012

Game 1 - The Flappers

THE TEAM got to play an actual game instead of a cheap forfeit.  It's so much more fun to beat The Flappers 22-4 than it is to have Blood and Spit forfeit because they tried to borrow a loud-mouthed pile of hamburger from the Burbank Chills.


The Flappers added some ladies who could play but it just didn't matter.  THE TEAM batted .632 with 2 Home Runs, 2 Triples, 6 Doubles, 7 Walks and only 1 strikeout.  Dave pitched 3 strong innings, Dora found the mark and did a great job fielding in her inning of pitching and then Lou slammed the door.  The Flappers never stood a chance.

Doug The Iron Gigante went 4 for 4 with a Triple and 3 RBIs.  Lou went 3 for 3 with a Home Run, a walk and 3 RBIs but the towel full of shaving foam goes to the face of  Peter who went 4 for 4 with a Home Run, 2 Doubles and 3 RBIs.

THE TEAM added a new player.  Natasha went 2 for 2 with a Triple, 2 RBIs and 2 Walks.  She gets a barrel full of Gatorade dumped across her back.

Everyone played a great game.


Monday, May 21, 2012

Game 1 - Sort of

Blood and Spit could not field a team so that means victory.  Usually we like to speak in terms of "Sweet Sweet Victory" but we can only say Victory on a forfeit.

It was exciting to get our jersey numbers assigned

2 Sema
3 Lou
8 Jad
10 Melody
11 Dave
16 Beth
17 Amy
18 Rick
19 Doug
21 Randy
24 Peter
25 Dora


Sunday, April 29, 2012

Practice Game Numero Uno

It was good to see The Flappers back.  It was even better to see Beth pitching.  She did a great job.  THE TEAM only struck out once and kept the errors down so things are looking up for the Summer 2012 Season.

There are no statistics for the practice rounds so you can fill in whatever you did in the game.  Feel free to lie and award yourself some homeruns you didn't hit and some game saving catches you didn't make.  Hell you can even steal a couple of bases even though we can't really do that in Coed Slow Pitch.

It's all good fun when THE TEAM wins 21-9


Sunday, March 11, 2012

THE TEAM - Winter 12

THE TEAM split a doubleheader to finish the season 6-4. That first game against The Great Bambinos was like error porn but THE TEAM defense tightened up against The Fockers.

So there you go.

It always ends up being a quick skim over the details when there is a doubleheader. It's a lot of softball. Lou's Grand Slam certainly stands out. That and the hardcore error porn. Steamy!

Let's see what you did this season:

2 Sema played in 8 games. She batted .375 with 7 RBIs, 2 doubles, a triple and 3 walks for an OBP of .444. Sema came in with a lot to learn and she improved a lot throughout the season.

3 Lou played in 10 games. He lead THE TEAM with an .811 batting average. He had 28 RBIs with 6 Home Runs, 9 Doubles, 2 Triples and 6 walks. Lou's determination makes everybody play better.

8 Jad played in 8 games. She batted .333 with 2 RBIs, a Double and 9 walks for a .533 OBP. She also didn't take any shit from anybody

10 Melody played in 5 games. What a 5 games though! She batted .727 with 8 RBIs, 1 Double, 1 Triple and 6 walks. That's an OBP of .824 on top being great at second base. Her injury was a terrible loss for THE TEAM

15 Dora played in 9 games. She batted .400 with 5 RBIs, 4 Doubles and 1 walk. Dirty Dora is there to play. She is all hustle. She also never struck out and didn't walk until the 9th game of the season.

16 Beth played in 10 games. She batted .217 with 6 RBIs and 6 walks for an OBP of .379. She did a great job at second base after Melody did whatever the hell she did to herself.

17 Amy played in 10 games. She batted .300 with 4 RBIs 2 Doubles and 6 walks for an OBP of .417. She also ran like hell and burned more calories per game than any two players on THE TEAM.

18 Rick played in 10 games, batted .794 with 20 RBIs 9 Doubles 2 Triples and 2 walks.

19 Doug played in 10 games. He batted .706 with 13 RBIs, 7 Doubles, 1 Triple and 2 walks. What an absolute stallion.

24 Peter played in 10 games. He batted .676. He led THE TEAM with 32 RBIs. He led THE TEAM with 8 Home Runs. He also had 5 Doubles and 3 walks. He can field. He can throw. He can be one helluva a good guy. He might be using the same performance enhancing drugs that Ryan Braun used.

25 Andrew played in 5 games. He batted .733 with 4 RBIs and 2 Doubles. He hurt his back. I hope he is OK.

38 Michelle played in 6 games. She batted .167 with 2 RBIs and 6 walks for an OBP of .318. She was the most relaxed player on THE TEAM. Except for when it was time for her to bat or she didn't care for a call the umpire made. Other than that

99 Chris played in 8 games. He batted .704 with 10 RBIs, 7 Doubles and 3 walks. Chris is a founding member of THE TEAM and in 12 seasons has never struck out. On top of all that ability as a hitter there was his MVP performance as a pitcher. His choice to take his talents to Simi Valley is a huge blow to THE TEAM.

Decent season

Lots of fun


Sunday, March 4, 2012

That Was Close Too

THE TEAM got a little two out rally going in the bottom of the 7th. THE TEAM scored 16 runs. There was a great catch by Beth. There was a 2 RBI triple by Doug and a 2 RBI Double by Dora in there too but it wasn't enough.

THE TEAM batted .632 with 8 Doubles 1 Triple 1 Walk and 3 Strikouts.

The Lou and Peter Award goes to Chris. He went 4 for 4 with 3 Doubles and 2 RBIs. He also pitched a gem and turned a doubleplay.

The Dora Award goes to Amy who went 4 for 5 with a double and an RBI. That RBI double was part of the two out rally so not only is Amy starting to hit, but she is also clutch. Amy had a rough start to the seasom but in the second round she is batting .600 with 3 RBIs, 3 Doubles, 1 Walk and Zero Strikouts.

Does THE TEAM miss Melody and Jad?

Yes! It was a 16-18 loss. Those two are worth 3 runs at least.


KISS still sucks


Sunday, February 26, 2012

That was Close

We knew the Burbank Chills were going to improve. They were certainly having a good time. They are, without a doubt, the loudest opponent THE TEAM has ever faced. When we win they seem like a zany bunch that is having a good time. If we had lost then they would have seemed like a bunch of loud-mouthed a**holes. The 13-12 win means they are officially zany although I would guess Lou hates them.

Just a guess

The game started slow until Lou broke it open with a Grand Slam. The Burbank Chills managed to tie the game after a tough 3rd inning. THE TEAM came right back with a 3 run Homer by Peter and an RBI Double by Amy. Lou added another Home Run and it was Hello Sweet Sweet Victory. There was a double play in there too.

THE TEAM batted .607 with 3 Home Runs, 8 Doubles, 3 walks and 3 Strikeouts.

The Lou and Peter Award goes to Lou. He went 3 for 3 with a Walk, 2 Home Runs and 6 RBIs. That sounds kind of weird. This week we are calling it the Peter and Chris Award. Lou gets the Peter and Chris Award.

The Dora Award has to go to Dora for going 3 for 4 with a double. OK Lou gets the Peter Criss Award and Dora gets the Ace Frehley Award. Amy gets the Paul Stanley Award for taking the lead back with the RBI double and Sema gets the Gene Simmons Award...

... Wait a minute



Sunday, February 19, 2012

The Randy

That was one of those great games where we get to play a good team but they never really threaten. It's fun and it feels competitive but The Bombers never got close to THE TEAM.

THE TEAM batted .594 with 1 Home Run, 8 Doubles, 8 Walks and 3 Strikeouts. THE TEAM managed to hit that magic mark and score 16 runs. That seems to be the key to victory. Holding The Bombers to 7 runs helps too.

Sema did a good job leading off for the ladies. Beth did a good job at Second Base. The Dora Award goes to Jad who went 2 for 3 with a walk and an RBI.

Really though this game was all about Randy. He hurt himself early but played through the pain. He held down third base as best he could and then did the only thing he could do when it was time to bat. He walked when they gave it to him and he hit perfect line drives that wouldn't require a hard run to get to first. Randy finished 2 for 2 with 2 walk and 5 RBIs. Powerful good!

THE TEAM was shorthanded going into the game but everybody contributed and everybody played hard. That's a great way to spend a Sunday.


Sunday, February 12, 2012

THE TEAM - Crashin' and Burnin'

THE TEAM must have been devastated by the loss of Whitney Houston or something. THE TEAM is much better than that. The Fockers scored 11 runs in the first inning. THE TEAM scored zero. It's hard to bounce back from that but we tried. The Swingers were a good team. Either way THE TEAM is now 3-2 and looking Z League.

Let's look at out leaders for the first round

AVG - Men

Lou .833
Andrew .833
Rick .750

AVG - Ladies

Melody .727
Dora .400
Sema .364

RBIs - Men

Peter 22
Lou 12
Rick 10

RBIs - Ladies

Melody 8
Sema 2
Dora 2
Beth 2

Home Runs

Peter (6)
Lou (2)


Lou (2)
Rick (2)
Melody (1)


Lou (4)
Peter (3)
Rick (3)
Dora (2)
Melody (1)

THE TEAM is batting .544 with 34 walks and 17 Strikouts.

There is still a second round to sweep and a championship to win. Right? RIGHT!


Sunday, January 29, 2012

The Honey Badgers

The Honey Badgers had some people that could hit the ball to the freakin' moon. They also had something like 1000 people on their team so it seemed like everybody only got two at-bats. It didn't help them that THE TEAM defense is tough and held them to 3 runs until the last inning. The other thing about having 1000 people is a couple of them are bound to be a**holes. ( Our women are trained? What a dumb fucking ape!)

Who cares about them!

It was another awesome Sunday with THE TEAM winning 16-8. Where to begin...

It started with Doug and Amy bringing red socks for THE TEAM. Jad kept it going by wearing them even though she likes the Yankees. THE TEAM had two walks and 5 hits in the first inning including a Home Run by Peter to score 6 in the top of the first. Chris was in the zone and didn't walk anybody until the last inning. Melody made a great throw to turn a double play and Beth made a great catch in right. Dirty Dora ended up bruised and covered in dirt. Sema got her first RBI of the season. The HoneyBadgers never stood a chance.

THE TEAM batted .525 with 2 Home Runs, 2 Doubles, 2 Triples, 4 Walks, and 3 strikeouts.

The Lou and Peter Award goes to Chris who had three sweet bloop shots from the leadoff spot and pitched a beauty.

The Dora Award goes to Beth who went 1 for 2 with an RBI and a great catch in the outfield.

The Sema Award goes to Michelle and the Randy Award goes to Me.

Isn't this fun?


Sunday, January 22, 2012

The Burbank Chills

The Burbank Chills. What a horrible name for a softball team. At least they didn't have s**ty nicknames on the backs of their jerseys. Did they? They were a pretty inexperienced group and they are going to improve a lot as the season goes on. Not his week though.

THE TEAM batted .500 with 2 Home Runs, 2 Doubles, 2 Triples, 2 Strikeouts and 11 Walks. The Burbank Chills were held scoreless in 4 of the 6 innings and that's how THE TEAM won 15-7.

Lou and Peter hit home runs. Those guys are clearly A-League talent on a G League team. Let's name our award after them. The Lou and Peter Award goes to Randy going 2 for 2 with a walk and an RBI and ending the game with that sweet double play.

Should we award Melody a Dora Award? Dora always hustles and it seems to help THE TEAM get its motor going. Melody went 1 for 1 with an RBI and 2 walks. Let's give the Melody and Dora Award to Amy who made a great catch for a 3rd out in Right Field.

Is anyone else confused?

It was a great game by everyone


Sunday, January 15, 2012

The Bombers

The Bombers were not a bad team. Some of them looked familiar and they could do some things. However, they could not do enough to stop THE TEAM. They were having some problems with their pitching so it never really got scary.

THE TEAM batted .643 with two Home Runs, a double, 12 walks and 3 strikouts. That's a lot of walks. It seems like walks cause errors so The Bombers had a large serving of those.

The Bombers scored 4 in the top of the first and THE TEAM took it right back with 5 runs in the bottom of the first that started with a 3 run homer by Peter. That was nice. THE TEAM gave up some more runs but led for the whole game. In top of the 6th THE TEAM held The Bombers to zero runs and the umpire told them they could get another at-bat if they got a quick 3 outs. Instead Lou hit a 2 run home run to put THE TEAM up 20-13 when blue called the game.

Sweet sweet victory.

After that it was drinkies after winnies. Happy 21st Birthday Amy. Lou, Beth, Doug, Melody, Michelle, and Amy all did a great job of drinking while The Packers croaked out of the playoffs. But who cares about that crew of millionaire strangers. THE TEAM won.