Tuesday, November 19, 2013


Lucky for THE TEAM Peter was smart enough to check the standings after the season was over otherwise the surprise trip to the playoffs would have ended up as a 7-0 forfeit.  Lucky for THE TEAM it was only an 18-5 loss. 
Maybe lucky is not the right word.  The game started off pretty tight.  It was 1-0, it was 1-2, it was 2-4.  THE TEAM kept it within reach and then...

Lou did a great job pitching and held it together when they took their walks but THE TEAM hit a mere .467 with only 3 extra base hits so that was not really the path to sweet sweet victory.  It was still fun to get an extra game out of it.  Right?  Mike got to play and he was 2 for 3 with an RBI which was 20% of the total offensive output for THE TEAM.  More importantly, Melody took some pictures that he turned into masterpieces that brought THE TEAM and all of facebook closer together.  Those pictures were probably more fun than the game.


Monday, November 11, 2013

THE TEAM - Fall 2013

That was an extra grouchy season of softball but THE TEAM sure did finish strong.  The Ballers were undefeated in the second round until they tangled with THE TEAM.  Natasha went 2 for 2 with a walk and 4 RBIs.  Doug went 2 for 2 with 2 walks, a Home Run and 5 RBIs.  Welcome to Lance Armstrong's medicine cabinet.  The game ended on a heads up play by Lou and Peter to get the last out at third.  That was a great big deal considering the game ended 15-14. 

So THE TEAM finished 6-4 scoring 132 runs and allowing 125.  THE TEAM batted .586 with 13 Home Runs 36 Doubles 6 Triples 28 Walks and 16 Strikeouts.  Let's also tip the cap to Sandy and Mike who helped out when THE TEAM needed them.  Kelly was also a sub but it kind of seemed like she was still on THE TEAM.  She had an OBP of .500 and an RBI in 4 games including one where she was there to watch and ended up playing.

Now let's check you out:

Summer made some fantastic plays in the outfield while hitting .621 with 7 RBIs and a Double in 8 games.  She never struck out and ran like hell.

Lou played in all 10 games.  He led THE TEAM batting .789.  He led THE TEAM with 28 RBIs.  He led THE TEAM with 13 Home Runs.  His 13 Doubles and 3 Triples were also tops.

Jenny played in 3 games but they were great games.  She batted .700 with 5 RBIs and a walk.  Fear the cardigan

Melody played in 8 games.  She had 5 RBIs, 2 Doubles and hit .476.  She led THE TEAM with 10 walks giving her an OBP of .645.

Natasha pitched lights out in her 9 games.  She hit .457 and led the ladies with 14 RBIs.  She also had 2 Doubles and a Triple.

Samantha played in zero games.  She batted .000 but hey, she never struck out.  Oh well.  She seemed nice that one day when we met her.

Rick 10 games .536  14 RBIs 2 Home Runs 3 Doubles 1 Triple

Doug  played in all 10 games.  He batted .655 with 15 RBIs, 1 Home Run, 5 Doubles and 6 Walks.  He led THE TEAM in complaining when this blog was not submitted in a timely manner.

Peter played in 8 games.  He hit .667 with 13 RBIs, 2 Home Runs, 3 Doubles.  Peter is a solid citizen and a key ingredient to the success of THE TEAM.

Dora cranked out another 10 games of crazy pull hitting.  She batted .472 with 3 RBIs.  There were also some great plays catching foul balls from her spot at catcher.

Victor played in only 6 games but he gave THE TEAM 10 games worth of noise.  He batted .700 with 2 Home Runs, 15 RBIs, 6 Doubles and 1 Triple. 

Jeff played in 9 games.  He hit .552 with 7 RBIs, 1 Double and 1 Walk.  He legged 'em out with his jersey flapping in the wind.

Sharon played in 6 games.  She hit .421 with 2 RBIs.  Her follow through was exquisite.

The expanded playoff format means that THE TEAM has actually made the playoffs so the last post where the Championship dream was formally introduced to the toilet can be shelved in fiction.

That's exciting


Monday, October 28, 2013

Eight and Nine

We started off with dinner at The Flying Pig in Little Tokyo.  That slice of town is really swingin' and so was dinner.  The service was nice.  We had Pork Belly Bao Buns.  There were onions and a pickle on them it was certainly tasty but all of that kind of ran over the pork flavor.  It was actually better to pull all of that off and let the pork belly work its magic.  We had Duck Fried Rice and Lobster Mac and Cheese.  The Mac and Cheese was excellent even without the Lobster.  It wasn't filled with overwhelming chunks, there were just nice pieces in there to give it a unique flavor.  It may have actually been crab or seasoned fish but either way it was still very good.

After that it was off to the Ahmanson Theater to see Danny DeVito and Judd Hirsch in The Sunshine Boys.  It's Neil Simon so it was hilarious.  It's Danny DeVito so that is also pretty hilarious.  The sets were good.  All the actors were good.  Judd Hirsch was doing some kind of weird Jackie Mason thing with his voice that was a little distracting but it was still a funny fast moving production.

Oh...  THE TEAM got swept in a doubleheader

Championship dream, may I introduce you to toilet


Monday, October 21, 2013

Game 7 - You Asked For It

This game had it all.  The late rally.  The Home Runs.  The tiebreaker.  The bench clearing brawl.  Morgana running out onto the field and planting a big wet smooch on Doug.  The flyover by the Blue Angels. 

Some of that might not be true.  The clipboard says that it all happened.

Let's give Melody some steroids for going 2 for 3 with a walk and an RBI.  Please share your steroids with Kelly who went 3 for 4.  And Summer who is proving to be a very valuable outfielder.  And Natasha who didn't walk anybody.

Peter went 5 for 5 with a Home Run and 4 RBIs so that is macho.

THE TEAM has not had to go to a tiebreaker in a few years.  Giving up a Home Run to Tiger Blood's first batter looked like the nail but two outs later and THE TEAM had a chance.

Peter hit a double.  Kelly scorched a line drive that was unfortunately caught.  Lou slams the door and THE TEAM wins after a game that had everything.


Monday, October 14, 2013

Game 6 - The Full Garcia

I'd Hit That must have closets full of multicolored sportswear.  They were Fugitabouditt and then they became The Fockers and now, after a season off, they are back as I'd Hit That.  They are a nice group and we always had a lot of fun playing them.  Usually it would be a good close game and  THE TEAM would win.  So that adds up.

It was pretty tight and then Lou and Victor each hit a Grand Slam.  There was a late rally and some atrocities in the field but THE TEAM held on to win 15-14 with Natasha snagging the last out.  That's something that doesn't get a lot of attention in this blog that belongs to all of THE TEAM but only one asshole writes on.  Natasha always does a great job pitching but she also does a perfect job fielding her position.  That can be tricky adjusting to weak little bounces and sizzling rockets that can zoom past a pitcher.

Summer gets a George Teague jersey.  She went 2 for 4 and moved Peter into scoring position but she was an absolute hero in the outfield.  Summer is locked in.

The Hepatitis Steroid Cheese Dog goes to Victor with a side of Griffey elbow and Bagwell legs, knees, or whatever the hell he was doing.  Victor had two Doubles and a Grand Slam giving him 7 RBIs on the day. 

Not even an annoying (if adorable ) barking dog could stop THE TEAM 

The second round is ripe with promise


Monday, October 7, 2013

Game 5 - The Bats Aren't That Heavy

It's no secret that patience is important when hitting.  I'm sure everyone on THE TEAM has given away a couple of outs swinging at some stool sample of a pitch that they should have let bounce by.  However, waiting for the perfect pitch and hoping for a walk should not be the plan for the afternoon.  That was who THE TEAM played and lost to.

Of course scoring only six runs is almost always going to mean a loss so there is another slice of negative in a blog is supposed to be constructive and zany.  Let's focus on the positive!  Whatever.  Kelly was awesome at third and Summer was spectacular in Right Field. 

Let's award Sharon bumper trim for a 1980 Chrysler Le Baron covered in steroids for leading THE TEAM going 3 for 3 with 2 RBIs.  Welcome aboard Sharon.

Let's look at the First Round Leaders:

Batting Average Men

.889 Victor
.778 Lou
.692 Doug

Batting Average Ladies

1.000 Jenny
.625 Sharon
.600 Summer

RBIs Men

15 Lou
8 Victor
6 Peter

RBIs Ladies

5 Natasha
3 Dora
3 Jenny


Lou (5)
Victor (2)
Doug (2)
Natasha (1)
Peter (1)
Rick (1)


Lou (2)
Natasha (1)
Victor (1)
Rick (1)

Home Runs

Lou (3)
Victor (1)
Peter (1)

So THE TEAM finishes the First Round 3-2 but there is still the second round.

So you're sayin' there's a chance


Sunday, September 29, 2013

Game 4 and 5 - The Mystery Guests

I don't know what kind of kryptonite The Dancing Homers are dealing in but they must look at the standings and wonder how THE TEAM wins any games at all.  Let's give credit where credit is due, they are a good team.  They throw strikes and they hit a lot of clean line drives.  None of that should mean that THE TEAM hits .455 with 2 Doubles and 2 Strikeouts...   and two stinkin' runs.  How on earth!  Still it was nice to see # 13 Sandy back in action hitting a single and bring all that hustle to the proceedings.

The second game started off tough and ended up weird.  THE TEAM got a face full of sunshine and went down in order in the first inning.  Comic Relief did the same thing.  Eventually the sun got the hell out of there and everybody started hitting.  Lou had 2 Doubles, a Triple and a Home Run for 6 RBIs.  Natasha had a Double a Triple and an RBI.  Victor smashed another Home Run and made a Hepatitis C joke that he was as pleased with as he was with his 5 RBIs.

THE TEAM gained a new player.  Sharon made a splash right away with some good hitting being all athletic and so forth.

Jenny finally made her Fall debut with THE TEAM and it was worth the wait.  She went 4 for 4 with 3 RBIs.  ( A run scored on her one out so THE TEAM counts that as a sacrifice ).  In fact her debut was strong enough that she gets all the old office furniture out of Lane Kiffin's office at USC.  Good to see you Jenny

Lou has a shelf full of steroids so Victor wins the Obamacare enrollment package ( Due October 1st) for his great game.  Maybe it can help with the Hepatitis thing he was howling about.

Although maybe Jenny should get the enrollment package because that clumsy ape tried to throw her out at first from left field.  That looked like bad news.  It also looked like the only way they were going to stop Jenny.  At least the umpire addressed the preposterous choice he made.  I don't know what was said but everybody was pretty grouchy by the time it was over.  When the other bozo was crying about being called out at third and blue reversed his call then weird became official.  Of course THE TEAM winning 22 - 10 means he can boo hoo all he wants. 

Sweet Victory


Sunday, September 22, 2013

Game 2 - To the Rescue

Kelly showed up with a bag of McDonalds but she had to eat it cold because Melody ended up doing the Santini butt-muscle hustle and had to come out of the game.  Lucky for THE TEAM Kelly was there to help keep the Honey Badgers from giving a s**t.

These were not the Honey Badgers from a couple of seasons ago.  They were some other group of gunners who ended up changing their name at the last minute.  One of them said that they already had the shirts so that was why the Honey Badgers were wearing forest green baseball sleeves.   No name or numbers on their gear but they didn't want to replace the shirts.  Baseball sleeves cost what $5? 

Well that's none of our business but sleeves or no sleeves THE TEAM handed it to them 14-7. 

THE TEAM batted .652 and took 7 walks.  That's a lot of free bases and the patience paid off.  Lou had a Home Run and a Triple but Peter gets to eat the cobra going 3 for 3 with 2 RBIs and a upper deck shot if Olive # 4 was an upper deck.

Summer gets to eat larvae directly out of the beehive after going 2 for 3 with 2 RBIs.

Instead of just going with steroids to acknowledge outstanding effort I thought I would try to reference the name of whoever THE TEAM is playing.  That already looks like a bad idea.  It also meant watching that Honey Badger video on YouTube.



Sunday, September 15, 2013

Game 1 - Who The F**k Are These People

THE TEAM did a supreme job sandbagging the second practice game.  That 10-8 win made it look like we were pretty evenly matched with A League of Their Own.  (Didn't that movie come out in 1992?)  Well the ancient skeleton of Geena Davis was not there to help them and the results were brutal this time.

THE TEAM held them to 1 run.  In slow pitch softball you have to be playing some pretty snug defense to hold anybody to 1 run.  The official score was 17-1 but there were actually a couple of more runs after they kept playing with the mercy rule in effect.  Let's be honest though, those people could not hit worth a hoot.

THE TEAM sure could hit though.  THE TEAM batted .641 with 1 Home Run 3 Doubles 1 Triple and 1 Walk.  That's a pretty good day.

A train ride with Jon Lovitz goes to Natasha who went 3 for 5 with 3 RBIs.

Victor went 3 for 3 with a Double a Triple and 3 RBIs but it Lou gets to get drunk with Tom Hanks because of his Home Run and 5 RBIs.


Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Fall 2013

THE TEAM has seen The Flappers many times through the years and the carnage has been anywhere from “handing them their asses” to “opening a can”.  This practice game was no exception but that’s not the good news.

The good news is THE TEAM looked sharp after four weeks off.  There were no gnarly errors so that’s good.  There were no strikeouts which is great.  There were no swings and misses.  Think about that.  Let’s not even bring up Lou’s Home Run and Victor’s upper deck shot ( If there were an upper deck).

THE TEAM looks ready to go!!!


Monday, July 22, 2013

Literally Limping In

It looks like THE TEAM was worn down because it all ended in another shameful loss.  THE TEAM scored only 5 runs against Tiger Blood.  That last time something like that happened was the last game of last season.  You see.

Let's get right to the stats for Summer 2013

Summer set the record for the ladies by batting .667.  She had a double and a walk and 6 RBIs.  She had a gun in the outfield and a heart full of love.  I've never seen anything like it.

The only records Lou is chasing are his own.  He led THE TEAM in everything.  He batted .824 with 24 RBIs, 5 Home Runs, 8 Doubles, and 6 Triples.  Nobody else was close.

Jenny batted .417 with 2 RBIs and a walk.  Jenny only played in 4 games which was not in the best interest of THE TEAM.

Cassie batted .600 with 6 RBIs 1 Double and 2 Walks.  She also did the splits a couple of times knocking 'em down at third base.  Nobody else did that.

Melody batted .333.  She led THE TEAM with 15 Walks giving her an OBP of .590.  She also had 5 RBIs.  She played some infield.  She played some outfield.  She played her a** off.

Natasha batted .458.  She led the ladies with 8 RBIs and had 1 Double, 1 Triple, and 1 Walk.  She was also a spectacular pitcher.      

Rick .594 19 RBIs 3 Doubles 1 Triple and 4 Walks

Doug batted .607 with 13 RBIs, 1 Home Run, 2 Doubles, an 5 walks.  He was a spaz in the outfield and California cool at the plate. He would be C.G. Jung's favorite player on THE TEAM.

Peter batted .675 with 21 RBIs, 3 Home Runs, 3 Doubles, 2 Triples and an aggressive zero Walks.  He made eye popping stops and third and short kept his cool the whole time.

Dora batted .364 with 7 RBIs and a freakin' Triple.  After every season this blog mentions hustle and crafty base running.  Here we are again and Dora keeps going.

Victor batted .529 with 7 RBIs, 1 Home Run, 1 Double, 2 Triples, no Walks no Strikeouts and lots of great plays in left field.  THE TEAM could have used more Victor.

Kelly batted .474 with 2 RBIs and 3 Walks.  She is going to College now and THE TEAM is sad.  She ran smart and was a serous arm in the outfield.  She was friendly and mysterious.  Don't you think?

Jeff batted .480 with 10 RBIs, 1 Double, and 2 Walks.  He had some clutch hits late when THE TEAM needed them. 


Tuesday, July 16, 2013

Game 9 - Two halves two different games or the death of the Championship dream

Throughout this blog it is acknowledged that losing sucks no matter how you slice it.  It turns out there are always new slices and they all suck too.

THE TEAM started slow.  THE TEAM logo should be that green cross that you see on the medical marijuana dispensaries.  At the end of three it was 16 to not a chance in hell.  There were insane errors that didn't look like the usual mistakes that are bound to happen.  THE TEAM was hitting .363 with only 4 singles and no runs after everybody had an at-bat.  Disaster.

After all of that THE TEAM held The Swingers to zero runs in the next three innings.  THE TEAM batted .608 and scored 10 runs but an ass kicking is an ass kicking.  THE TEAM couldn't shake the "not a chance in hell" deal. 

The Swingers were undefeated in the second round so even if THE TEAM wins next week and The Swingers lose they will take first place in the tiebreaker.  The loss they were telling Victor about was in the first round.

So not a chance in hell


Sunday, June 30, 2013

Another Doubleheader, Another Sweep

Once again THE TEAM sweeps a doubleheader.  Here are a few things that help make it all extra-spectacular:

THE TEAM is now 6-2 which means we officially have a winning season so let's all get a taste of Crippler Chris heroin to celebrate. 

THE TEAM is undefeated in the second round so the dream of another championship is very much alive.


Game 1 was a snug 11-6 victory over The Goon Squad.  They were nice and we all took our walks (THE TEAM walked 11 times) but we really should have pounded those clowns.  Perhaps we were saving it for The Dancing Homers.

The Dancing Homers don't suck but they sure don't win that much either.  The two times we have played them we have taken a giant s**t when its time to hit.  When THE TEAM played them last season there were only 3 extra base hits in a 23-13 loss.  THE TEAM played them in Game 2 this season and batted .500 and scored only 8 runs.  Well THE TEAM finally punched through with 1 Home Run, 3 Doubles, 2 Triples and  .710 average.  It ended with a sweet 5 run rally and Jeff driving in the winning run for a 19-18 win.

Steroid tacos for Natasha who went 3 for 4 with 3 RBIs and steroid tacos for Jeff who also drove in 3 including the game winner in the clutch.  Go get a contact high at the Hollywood Bowl you two.


Monday, June 24, 2013

The Ladies

That was a pretty sweet win against the SoCal Furies.  Everybody contributed.  There were two Home Runs by Peter.  There was a GREAT play by Summer to throw a runner out at second.  It all ended in a 14-7 win for THE TEAM.

The ladies carried the day.  All together the women batted .684 with 6 RBIs.  That is awesome. 




Sunday, June 16, 2013

The First Round

It looks like THE TEAM is back on track after a couple of shitty games.  Tiger Blood was 2-1 going in and Team Puma was 3-0 but THE TEAM swept them in a double header to finish the first round strong.  There were Home Runs by Lou and Peter and an absolute monster of a Home Run by Victor.  There was a double play by Cassie.  There is always lots of good stuff all over the place when THE TEAM sweeps a doubleheader.  Lou pitched all of both games so he should hoist a cool one but he should hoist with his left hand.

Let's look at the leaders through the first round.

Batting Average Men

.882 Lou
.800 Rick
.714 Peter

Batting Average Ladies

.750 Summer
.500 Cassie
.500 Jenny

RBIs Men

13 Rick
12 Peter
11 Lou

RBIs Ladies

Summer 5
Melody 3
Cassie 3
Natasha 3
Dora 3


Lou 6
Rick 2
Doug 1
Peter 1
Victor 1
Jeff 1


Lou 1
Natasha 1
Peter 1
Rick 1

Home Runs

Lou 4
Peter 1
Doug 1
Victor 1

Overall THE TEAM batted .573 with 16 walks and 5 strikeouts but it certainly looks and feels like its coming together.


Sunday, June 9, 2013

Game 3

This looks like a good idea.  Don't you think?

Yeah! THE TEAM should be doing more of that.  The Swingers were a pretty solid group but when THE TEAM goes out there and hits .500 with 3 strikeouts it's going to be a long afternoon.  Losses should probably mean no steroids or pimp chalice or cup of greek yogurt or whatever we are awarding this season but this thing is supposed to be constructive and there were some great moments.  That means Lou gets a cup of banana pudding from the Magnolia Bakery for going 3 for 4 including a late grand slam to make it close.  Summer gets a Blu Ray copy of Les Miserables and a gallon of souvenir tears for going 2 for 3 with 3 RBIs.  Dora made a great play on a foul ball.  Everybody either had a hit or and RBI.

Hey Robinson Cano pulls his back foot up early in that video!  Man the Yankees suck.


Monday, June 3, 2013

Summer so Far

There was no blog after Game 1.  Do you know why?  Because I didn't feel like it.  Take that!  Now I have to cram two games worth of horseshit into one blog post.  The first game was against the SoCal Furies.  They looked like a rough bunch with a bunch of shaved head giants that were sending the ball to the moon.  They was actually a nice and friendly group of people.  Of course other always seem nice and friendly when we beat them.  Dora went 2 for 4 with 2 RBIs Doug hit a 2 run Home Run so that was fun.  Another nice detail from week 1 is zero strikeouts.

Week 2 was THE TEAM batting .500 with mostly singles.  Lou hit two home runs and a triple driving in 4 on the day.  The ladies batted .286 with 1 RBI.  It turns out Mike is not just enthusiastic but he is also athletic.  He got the call up and did a great job in left field.  THE TEAM got credit for 8 runs but we only scored 7.  That umpire clearly does not give a shit.  At least he stands up for the games these days.  Does anybody remember when he would plant himself on the bucket of balls and call the game sitting on his ass?  I sure do.

So yeah


Monday, March 25, 2013

THE TEAM - Just admit it!

Clearly somebody on THE TEAM stole Jobu's Rum.  How else can THE TEAM be held to 2 runs

Sunday, March 24, 2013

Winter 2013

What a hideous slide into mediocrity.

Here is what you want to know:

2 Summer batted .560 with 4 RBIs 3 Doubles and a walk. 

3 Lou led THE TEAM batting .889 with 28 RBIs 6 Home Runs led THE TEAM with 8 Doubles led THE TEAM with 5 Triples and had 1 Walk.

4 Jenny batted .333 with 4 RBIs.  No Walks No Strikeouts and the laser focus of a new mother.

8 Cassie batted .444 with 6 RBIs 1 Double and 2 Walks

10 Melody batted .400 led the ladies with 9 RBIs and led THE TEAM with 9 Walks

12 Natasha batted .467 with 3 RBIs 2 Doubles 3 Walks led THE TEAM in sliding and was a great pitcher.

15 Jad never recovered from her bum knee so THE TEAM lost out there

18 Rick batted .600 with 11 RBIs 4 Doubles 1 Triple 2 Walks and led THE TEAM in frowning because people were late.

19 Spaz batted.680 with 13 RBIs 1 Home Run 4 Doubles and 4 Walks

21 Randy batted .700 with 15 RBIs 1 Home Run 2 Doubles 1 Triple and 3 Walks

24 Peter batted .784 led THE TEAM with 7 Home Runs led THE TEAM with 30 RBIs and had 5 Doubles

25 Dora batted .344 with 7 RBIs and 2 Doubles.  We all know that if you could steal bases in slow pitch softball she would have led THE TEAM

27 Victor batted.609 with 9 RBIs 3 Home Runs 5 Doubles and 2 walks.   

THE TEAM says goodbye to Jad and Randy.  They will be impossible to replace.  Since there were no stats for Jad, let's look at her career.  34 Games 116 AB 50 Hits 31 RBIs 6 Doubles 1 Triples and 18 walks giving her a .431 AVG with a .507 OBP.

Let's go ahead and look at Randy's too.  Randy played in 28 Games 93 AB 66 Hits 1 Home Run 8 Doubles 3 Triples and 10 Walks for a .710 AVG and a .738 OBP.

There were a lot of stats in this blog post and no jokes.  This probably made for bad reading.  Maybe I should have polished off that Tullamore Dew first.


Sunday, March 10, 2013

Let's Get Some Heroin!!!

"There are three rules that I live by: never get less than twelve hours sleep; never play cards with a guy who has the same first name as a city; and never get involved with a woman with a tattoo of a dagger on her body. Now you stick to that, and everything else is cream cheese."

THE TEAM was fueled by Melody's birthday cupcakes so the 5150s did not stand a chance.  That is the sixth win of the season which means we are officially a winning team in F League.  Let's have some of the traditional Chris Kiefer Heroin to celebrate.

It was a tight game that was only tighter because we started short handed.  YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!!!

Let's get right to the steroids

Natasha went 2 for 3 which is certainly andro-worthy but she earned the full Bartolo Colon cycle with her pitching.  In the last inning all of her first pitches were strikes.  Awesome.

Randy went 2 for 3 with a base clearing Triple for 3 RBIs on the day.  Victor went 2 for 2 with a Double and a Home Run.  Enjoy your Sammy Sosa steroids.  Those steroids are so powerful they make you forget how to speak English.


Sunday, March 3, 2013

We CAN Dig It!!!

THE TEAM finally beat Can You Dig It.  THE TEAM scored 3 in the first and held the bad guys to 2.  Natasha was sharp so THE TEAM wasn't giving anything away. 

There is something about that left handed pitcher that seems to keep our runs down.  THE TEAM only scored 6 runs in 5 innings and were down by 5. 

Randy went 4 for 4 with 2 RBIs and his first Home Run.  So that was awesome!

The late rally was the thing that made this game great.  Jenny was hitting the ball well but knocking it right into the gloves of those Can You Dig It ghouls.  She came through with a clutch RBI late and THE TEAM was headed toward...

... Sweet Victory

It was a fun game because everybody contributed.  Gavin took some great pictures.  Mike helped make a lot of noise.  Anybody who joins a softball team imagines a day like today.

Let's award some steroids

We have already acknowledged Randy's Home Run and Lou went 4 for 4 with a Home Run and 3 Doubles but the Jason Giambi steroids go to Peter.  He went 4 for 5 with 2 Home Runs 2 Doubles and 6 RBIs.

Jenny rallied late and Summer went 2 for 4 on top of doing a great job in left field but the Guillermo Mota steroids go to Melody who went 2 for 4 with a walk and 3 RBIs to go along with sliding under the tag on Peter's double to put THE TEAM up by 3.

Great game. Great win.


Sunday, February 24, 2013

The First Round

So that was round 1 of F League.  Right now as this is being typed, Can U Dig It is playing the Madbatters.  If the Madbatters beat Can U Dig It by a score of 29-22 then THE TEAM wins the first round.  Of course no team in any league this season has scored 29 runs so I think we are not going to make it through the tie breaking process.

Enough of that baloney

THE TEAM started slow and scored zero runs in the first two innings.  Victor finally broke the seal with an RBI double.  THE TEAM chipped away with some nice rallys and Doug hit a Home Run and now THE TEAM is 4-1 going into the second round.

Here are some first round leaders:

Batting Average Men

.944   Lou
.842   Peter
.750   Rick

Batting Average Women

.500 Melody
.417 Natasha
.412 Cassie

RBIs Men

17 Lou
15 Peter
10 Rick

RBIs Women

4 Melody
4 Dora
3 Jenny
3 Cassie
3 Summer


3 Lou
3 Rick
3 Doug
3 Victor
2 Randy
1 Peter
1 Cassie


3 Lou

Home Runs

4 Lou
3 Peter
2 Victor
1 Doug

THE TEAM batted .588 with 17 Walks and 4 Strikeouts.  Let's not forget the lights out pitching from Natasha, Lou and Cassie.  Big Fun Sweet Victory


Monday, February 18, 2013

THE TEAM is loaded

THE TEAM is loaded with talent.  Of course Tiger Blood fielded like they spent the weekend doing drugs with Charlie Sheen.  Still, all the hookers and drugs in Hollywood don't make Cassie a good pitcher or Lou a great hitter.

This blog is completely fueled by Tullamore Dew and hookers though

We digress.  We'll save that for the theteamwhiskeyandhookers.blogspot.com

THE TEAM held off Tiger Blood's late rally to hand it to 'em 19-13.  Sweet victory.  Lou and Peter hit Home Runs.  Jenny had two RBIs.  Once again THE TEAM had 11 players and 8 of them had RBIs.  THE TEAM batted .667 with  3 Home Runs and 6 Doubles.  There were no walks.  We were there to play.

Peter went 4 for 4 with a Home Run and 5 RBIs but the Ryan Braun steroids go to Lou who went 4 for 4 with 2 Home Runs and 6 RBIs.

Jenny went 2 for 4 with 2 RBIs and Melody went 3 for 4 with an RBI but the Melky Cabrera steroids go to Cassie who not only went 3 for 4 with a double and an RBI but also did a great job pitching.

THE TEAM really is loaded with talent


Sunday, February 10, 2013

The Doubleheader

Doubleheaders are taxing.  Who else is tired?  Who else has some tasty portion of their sexy body hurting after two softball games? 

All right that's enough

A little pain is so much more manageable when THE TEAM sweeps a double header.  That's not just sweet victory, that's sweet sweet victory.

THE TEAM started slow against The Madbatters with no runs in the first or second inning.  Finally Doug drove in Cassie to break the seal and we started chipping away.  THE TEAM was still not doing the usual super caliente job of hitting.  There was one triple and one double.  The other 20 hits were all singles.  However those singles all added up to a beautiful late rally and a 17-15 win for THE TEAM.

The second game was against Team Puma.  Lou had a 3 run Home Run.  Peter had a 3 run Home Run.  Victor had a 3 run Home Run.  Team Puma never stood a chance.  Jad was waving them in all night from the third base coaching box.  Eight of the 11 players on THE TEAM had RBIs.  Great effort!

Now we move on from sweet victory to sweet slumber


Tuesday, January 22, 2013

Can U Take a Swing

Can U Dig It sure does like to takes their walks.  We all know they aren't there to do us any favors and swing at garbage but come on!  It's the same thing they did last time but it seems to be working so I'm sure they all hoisted a Zima and cheered their shrewd softball acumen after the game.

Here is what the Winter 2013 Roster looks like:

2 Summer
3 Lou
4 Jenny
8 Cassie
10 Melody
12 Natasha
15 Jad
18 Rick
19 Doug
21 Randy
24 Peter
25 Dora
27 Victor

Welcome back Jenny and welcome back Victor.  That is a dangerous looking group there.  That dangerous looking group batted .531 with 3 Home Runs 2 Triples 2 Doubles 1 Walk and 1 Strikout in a 22-10 loss.  There is still a lot to be excited about though.  There were Home Runs by Lou, Peter and Victor.  We put together a nice little two out rally.  Let's shake the rust off and shock the world.  Or at least let's shock F League.